n/a: what the fuck is wrong with you psycos? "Most gruesome slayings in the name of Harman."?
How about "most fucked up cockslaps in the world"

My my how witty, I do believe he/she has me in check. Hmm  "most fucked up cockslaps in the world" I shall take that intelligent remark in to consideration.  This comment is a prime example of an individual that desperately needs to get off their high horse.
Yet another sad case of a trash talking  netizen that hides behind the comfort of their computers within the confines of their abode.
By the way, you should at least learn how to spell "Psycho" correctly.  If you're going to utilize the word as a derogatory term.

n/a: none, anyone whose ever killed knows theres nothing preferable about it .

Congratulations, I applaud thy for stating the obvious.
Do you have any more words of wisdom that you feel the need to educate I about?
I appreciate your condescending comments. Thanks for insulting my intelligence. 
Feel free to educate I more about the lessons of life.
However  I do believe that you need a lesson in tolerance.
New experiences breed growth, the only true death is the life of one who's spent their idle time worrying too much about matters that doesn't concern them.  

Besides I feel that all of whom who use this website are emotionally mature enough to know that death is no laughing manner, but that doesn't  mean that you can't have fun parodying & making satire out of death.
There is beauty & art out of all aspects in life & death.
I feel that it's unhealthy to just turn a blind eye to something that you deem is undesirable,
But hey...what do I know, I'm not nearly as enlightened as you are :->

MY BLOODY VALENTINE!

Soma V. Valentine: I call it murder and a manicure. What I do is tie them to a chair, siphon their blood directly from their arm, and use it to polish their nails. After that I take an axe to their heart and gather all that blood in a bucket to use for arts and crafts. I’ll probably do a portrait of the victim’s head attached to a penguin first.
Ah hah,abstract art. As I always say, the world is my canvas, & thy blade is my brush. Paint the town CRIMSON.

Davis T. Valentine: In the event that someone pisses me off, I WILL get even. I tie them to the face of a cliff with rope that is part of a system of pulleys and what not so that if you struggle too much, a lone rod with something at the end of it falls forward and hooks around into you're crotch. If you're a girl, it's a razor dildo and if you're a guy it's a large generic blunt object >_<. Now here's where the fun comes in. You can prevent castration because once the mechanism has started, you can easily pull you're self free thereby falling off the face of said cliff and living long enough to enjoy the view. So what will you choose?
An interesting proposition. I like this guy,he has class. Davis is generous enough to provide his patrons with a choice. Kinda like how a deathrow inmate is kindly given a decision to either die from lethal injection or the electric chair.

For the women out there I highly reccomend to "Stay & endure the pleasurable pain of sensual malice."

Sara H. Valentine: Modified Russian roulette with your ex. Basically load the gun with a blank instead of a real bullet then make sure they are the looser by keeping track of where you loaded the bullet. Granted the will be injured but when you visit them in the hospital, you can all have a good laugh over the silly practical joke right before you beat them to death with the cheep wal-mart purse that they gave you for your birthday loaded with lead
You know, I sometimes ponder if the Valentines are related to Susie Sumner...

Jude K. Valentine: Nailing their arms to the wall of an old warehouse while a bulldozer is parked behind the wall. When you turn on the engine, drive slowly towards the wall to build their fear so they won't know when they will be mashed. At the last second, rush forward at the wall, effectivly destroying them and the wall.
Ah... how delightful, quite illuminating. Though I have to admit, that wall will be missed.

Final KILL
Due to space constraints this will be the final kill displayed at this page.

Lisker:If I'm going to kill someone for personal reasons, it'd have to last a while so I could get my full enjoyment out of it. First I'd strap them to a chair and read every single issue of the Killer 7 comics to them. Once they're done screaming, I'd get out a hammer and smash their testicles before saying "that was a tough nut to crack!"

then I'd pull out one of their eyes with a corkscrew, then hold it close to my face as I say "it looks like someone's got an eye on me!" then I'd remove every single hair on their head and throw it into a pile on the floor, then I'd jump into it like a pile of leaves and say "looks like I've gotten myself into a pretty hairy situation!"

then I'd cut off one of their ears and run off with it into another room and then say "can you hear me now?" into it, then I'd come back and cut off their genitalia and insert into their anus and say "when I told you to go screw yourself, I didn't mean for you to take it literally!"

then I'd pour boiling water down their throat and say "looks like you're in hot water now! Or should I say, hot water's in you now!" then I'd sever one of their legs and arms, and say "it looks like fucking with me cost you an arm and a leg!"

then I'd cut their head off and say "you really stuck your neck out this time!" then I'd pick their head and say "you'd lose your head if it wasn't attached!" then I'd shoot it into the trash and say "nothing but net!"

then I'd go and get the head out of the trash and insert it up their anus and say "you really need to get your head out of your ass!" then I'd pull out some organs through the hole at the top and say "you sure have guts!"

then I'd take their body and put it into a wood chipper and say "wow, you're all over the place!" then I'd offer to take care of my neighbor's dog for the weekend and bring them to the spot where the remains are so I can feed some of it to the dog then later the dog will do his business on the remaining remains and

I'll say "you really are a piece of shit now!" then I'd probably get bored and go do something else.
Ah yes, those Killer 7 comics were pure torture. Don't even get moi started on the butchered "made for kids tv" story line.
It looks like you've mastered thy art of one liners. Now if only I could hire somebody to kill that verizon wireless schmuck.
"Can you hear me now?", god damn I can not stand his inane babble.

Most gruesome slayings in the name of Harman.

SatellitesSummonOdin: Break n' Take hour torture.
What I do is attach them to a wall, via chains, straps, cuffs and the sort. Then I proceed to cut off certain parts of the body every day.
My preferred order is: 5 fingers from left hand, left arm, five fingers from right hand, right arm, left foot, right foot, then I proceed to take a long cord of barbed wire, and push it down their urethra every 2 hours.
Then when all is said and done, and their soul and body rots away, I cut off their scalps, and keep them as my own.
I see, so thou art a scalp collector as well.
Waiter, I wish to apply for the 5 finger discount.
I must admit, I completely adore the way you prepare your meat.
I shall depart with a few words of wisdom...
nothing compares to the sweet aroma of shake N' bake torture, with a side dish of castration.

Mifune: Segment each organ; with a blunting spoon, into microwavable bowls and then microwave for 17 seconds whilst planting c4 and running.
Ahh, microwaveable fresh like a TV dinner..
Alessio Arena: Grab victim's head,smash him against a window,then pull him back and fill him full of lead with my customized colt 1911(it has two barrels)...i know i'm fuckin' wicked!
Delightfully brutal...
Kroni: Beat them with an Xbox.
Heh heh how random. Random is good.
rocky: shoving a wet towel down ur throat till the stomach starts 2 digest it then pull the towel out,out comes ur digestive system!
James Sunderland: I like to take a chainsaw run em' through and then stomp on them until they're dead!

Genocide123: Split a body into 2 with a Samurai sword.
Dead Mercenary : I like to kill people by asking them to look into a microscope in order to look at something I want to
show them, then when they adjust it some knives come out and ram them in the eyes,
and if they're wearing any glasses, I crush them and say "I guess you won't be needing these anymore..."
Now that's what I call being creative. Dead even included a cheesy one liner.
albi: i like shot children whit my k7-23 and eat their fucking brain
Tsk tsk albi, necrophilia how morbid....exactly as it should be heh heh heh.
Albie: Feces in someone's mouth that they choke on
Carine Karen: Putting my flamethrower into someone's mouth and burn him to Hell...HA-HA-HA!!!Burn O' Mighty Fire, BURN!
Akura: Digging someone's throat out with a rusty spoon. Oh, the pain.

Ah yes, now these quotes are what I call sadistic. Exactly what I'm looking for.
Though I ponder why is everybody always targeting the mouth?
Why not gouging someone's eyes out with a pick, shoving chopsticks all the way up some bodies nostrils,
pleasing a woman's libido to the point that her orgasms are so vigorous that she starts to vomit,
and suffocates from her own throw up,
Ripping someone's arm off, and then proceed to beat them to death with it
and most importantly flaying the flesh of a man's genital area with hot boiling water,
or clipping a woman's bosoms ni...nah I think I'll stop right there y'all get the picture.