Mizzurna Falls (hard)
Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2023 8:21 pm
So recently I tried to play through this piece of crap. And I came to realization that almost no fucking body really played the game as it is. By that I mean going blind, trying to complete it fair and square.
I can't take seriously anyone who's gonna say that this game is a mustahpeace without looking like a clown to me. Like this game fucking sucks and being "one of the first real-time open world adventure" isn't justifying how bad this game is.
Gameplay sounds simple as it is. You have time limit, you have an open world, fool around and try to uncover the secrets of Mizzurna. Except it's fucking impossible without a guide. I thought that this is all comes from casual audience, but fucking no. This game is literally impossible to advance without a guide. I played till 5th day just fine prior getting zero events to advance plot a bit further. At least in the beginning you have more clues about your next steps.
But whatever, the real adversary is how buggy this shit is. Like really, these examples are just funny moments:
https://files.catbox.moe/rgjfuo.mp4
https://files.catbox.moe/6ru2xe.mp4
And I thought that these are emulator problems and such, but no, japs confirm that it's all here on actual console. Including the bug where you can fall under the map and have no means to somehow get back and continue your playthrough. No, only starting the game from the beginning of the day.
iirc some site mentions that in guide book some of the bugs got labelled as "features" allowing to "save time". The hell is that? lol
Oh, there's also that godawful 2.5D fighting sequence that are janky as fuck.
Idk about the ending, but till 4th day I wondered will this shit actually all of Twin Peaks plot points or do something unusual. And like 80% of major plot points were ripped from TP. /suicide101
And what makes me seethe so hard is that people unironically give this game 4/5 or 5/5 rating, as if it's a fucking that needs a little of polish and it'll be a GOAT. I bet these people don't even tried to complete game without a very funny English guide on gamefags. I haven't looked into it aside from few minutes, but I chuckled hard when the author claimed that in-game hour takes around 5 minutes of real time, pedowiki cited that as truth and voila, I can certainly assure that these people didn't play the game. It takes like 10 minutes of real time for 1 hour to pass in-game, which is confirmed by japs wiki page and let's plays. But I'm being a fag. LOOK AT ME
What's funny is that a year or so later, David Cage released The Nomad Soul, which was better than Mizzurna in every way but open-world. It also contains fighting sequence and surprisingly enough FPS elements. But that's not a japanese game so it can't be a 10/10 for weebs. Although it's a better game overall.
Thank you for joining my FagXTalks! /swoon
I can't take seriously anyone who's gonna say that this game is a mustahpeace without looking like a clown to me. Like this game fucking sucks and being "one of the first real-time open world adventure" isn't justifying how bad this game is.
Gameplay sounds simple as it is. You have time limit, you have an open world, fool around and try to uncover the secrets of Mizzurna. Except it's fucking impossible without a guide. I thought that this is all comes from casual audience, but fucking no. This game is literally impossible to advance without a guide. I played till 5th day just fine prior getting zero events to advance plot a bit further. At least in the beginning you have more clues about your next steps.
But whatever, the real adversary is how buggy this shit is. Like really, these examples are just funny moments:
https://files.catbox.moe/rgjfuo.mp4
https://files.catbox.moe/6ru2xe.mp4
And I thought that these are emulator problems and such, but no, japs confirm that it's all here on actual console. Including the bug where you can fall under the map and have no means to somehow get back and continue your playthrough. No, only starting the game from the beginning of the day.
iirc some site mentions that in guide book some of the bugs got labelled as "features" allowing to "save time". The hell is that? lol
Oh, there's also that godawful 2.5D fighting sequence that are janky as fuck.
Idk about the ending, but till 4th day I wondered will this shit actually all of Twin Peaks plot points or do something unusual. And like 80% of major plot points were ripped from TP. /suicide101
And what makes me seethe so hard is that people unironically give this game 4/5 or 5/5 rating, as if it's a fucking that needs a little of polish and it'll be a GOAT. I bet these people don't even tried to complete game without a very funny English guide on gamefags. I haven't looked into it aside from few minutes, but I chuckled hard when the author claimed that in-game hour takes around 5 minutes of real time, pedowiki cited that as truth and voila, I can certainly assure that these people didn't play the game. It takes like 10 minutes of real time for 1 hour to pass in-game, which is confirmed by japs wiki page and let's plays. But I'm being a fag. LOOK AT ME
What's funny is that a year or so later, David Cage released The Nomad Soul, which was better than Mizzurna in every way but open-world. It also contains fighting sequence and surprisingly enough FPS elements. But that's not a japanese game so it can't be a 10/10 for weebs. Although it's a better game overall.
Thank you for joining my FagXTalks! /swoon
Spoiler
Though I'd be glad to discuss the game /downie